Forces Of Nature
by lysachan
Summary: The fic takes place during S01 ep.19 [Mission La Roca – Part 1] and explores Natalie's thoughts during the fairly dramatic events. Spoilers for the finale. Femslash.


The earthquake was completely unexpected although we knew the area had seismic activity. I can't even begin to discribe the fear that overtook me the second I realised what was going on. My first thought was to run. To run, as fast as I could, out of the building. Then I remembered my patients. They wouldn't be able to get out on their own and the strong fear was briefly replaced by guilt. Guilt of the fact that I was about to flee and leave the people who trusted me behind.

I could feel the building starting to collaps. There was no way I'd get out fast enough anymore so I went into a full doctor mode and helped my assistant to move people away from the falling pieces of ceiling. It just wasn't enough. Big blocks of rock and wooden beams were falling everywhere around us and it was obvious we'd be buried alive. There was no way everybody would survive. What a shitty way to die.

I blamed myself for not telling her how I feel, for being too afraid to respond to her subtle, questioning signals. I was a coward.

- - - -

I was alive. And I'd never seen Steven so angry. He's always been good at turning his fustration and fear to anger whereas I'm not. I build an invisible wall and don't show my emotions to anyone, instead I throw myself into work. It's the way things are. It's the way they've always been.

There we were, surrounded by what used to be the ceiling and walls of the clinic. My forearm hurt like hell and it was hard to breath because of the suffocating dust.

"Eva and Miles, are they here?" Stephen asked, mentally shaking me awake. His eyes were filled with worry.

"No, no. Miles, he went up north and Eva, she drove to the hospital south of town," I answered with a raspy voice, checking the injury in my forearm.

"We haven't heard from them," As soon as Stephen had said it I paralysed with fear again. But this time it wasn't because of worrying for my own fate. Eva. Oh my God. I hardly heard Stepher explaining the seriousness of the situation. The earthquake had been 7,4 on the Richter scale.

We managed to get out of the ruins somehow. What used to be a clinic was now a pile of cement and rocks. And we even succeeded in getting Mari Lue with us. She was the only survivor, besides me. But I didn't feel lucky. I felt numb, unemotional. The fear was getting stronger and stronger by the minute. I have no memories of us driving to the hospital but I finally snapped awake when I saw the situation in there.

There were people everywhere, hurt and crying for help. There was no time to tidy myself up and I don't think I even would've if given the chance. Eva had to be somewhere in the hospital. Maybe she'd made it there or someone had brought her in. I started treating the patients, constantly hoping that the next one would be our dark-haired press girl. She had to be alive.

- - - -

Seconds turned into minutes and minutes turned into hours. It soon became clear that Eva wasn't among the patients. She wasn't in the hospital. She hadn't made it there. The invisible wall between me and the rest of the world got thicker and thicker with every breath I took. I forced myself not to think about all the worse case scenarios but I couldn't fight the image of my best friend's lifeless body laying somewhere. Miles, he was a doctor, he could take care of himself to a certain extent. Eva couldn't, she was the press liaison of the group for god's sakes!

Stephen walked in just when I was about to lose it. He asked me about the disease due to which we'd flown over to this southern country in the first place. I'd forgot all about it. Explaning the medical situation helped me to get my thoughts together and ease my inner trumoil. Though the thought of my distroyed lab made me feel rather hopeless as I had to start the research from square one again.

Frank met us in the hallway, carrying a map to 'La Roca', the church where Miles had went. It crossed my mind to protest hard and order them to search for Eva first, but I knew it'd be useless and I threw the idea out of the window as quickly as possible.

Stephen was explaining us how he and Frank could get up north when a familiar voice sounded in my ears.

"I thought I'd find you here," Eva said, smiling. She was panting slightly and there was a nasty looking cut on her forehead.

"Eva!" I couldn't believe my eyes, and the pure joy which washed over me as soon as I saw the smaller woman standing in front of me. I sent a silent thank you to whatever power that had protected her from getting badly hurt. She looked at me, understanding the upsetting situation I'd been in the whole day, and smiled. I wanted to hug her right there and then.

And later, as I gently put my hand on her forearm to reassure her about finding that little boy's family, and when she looked at me with such trust it left me breathless, I knew I'd been given a second chance.


End file.
